dear old friend,

I hear you’re back in town, spineless with a tear jerk representing your loyalty. A man who’s consciousness has escaped him before the age of 14, someone with a lost soul within his mind. Are you happy with how it ended? Back in the same town you swore was smaller than you, now it seems quite large? Do you wish you could speak to me, make it right? Or are you eager to hold on to your stubbornness in exchange of embarrassment? Do you ask yourself what I had against you, or do you see now my empathy? 

Friendships are hard they say, female friendships are quite intimate. Brushing hair, sharing clothes, holding hands, sharing friends because two women equal sisterhood. You’ve betrayed my trust the same way he betrayed yours, does it feel any better? An eye for an eye. I would be lying to you if I told you I hadn’t wished upon your downfall just for my own stubbornness of wanting to be right. I wish to tell you I had no ill intent. Knowing you’re back from where you left, fills me with a bit a pride for myself and disappointment for you. Feelings are complex, and as much as I wished to be right, I wouldn’t actually seek your punishment.

You should see this as an opportunity. This is a second chance for yourself. Abuse it, before you cannot. Establish yourself with who you wish to be. No military wife wishes that for themselves, it will always just be an escape, maybe in the name of love, maybe not. He too felt very complex, couldn't grasp his emotions. He needed to feel prideful, puffing his chest and kissing other swollen lips; other wives, maybe other husbands. You sat at home, counting the clock, hearing the microwave beep after warming up his food for the third time in hopes he would walk through the door soon and it wouldn’t be another late night. Were you wrong? Or were you hopeful?