I’ve been here all along

I’ve been here all along

watching, observing your journey.

right now it feels like this wound has been freshly beaten with a belt.

I wish we could set ourselves free of the hunger that aches in our stomach

I cannot reach out, I try

in my dreams I see this light, this glow shaped like you

I hold onto it but it fades into my hands

I try so hard to chase it but it skips over me and turns into dust

I try to put the pieces together but it comes into all shapes but the one it was originally in

I wish I could feel my pain twice as hard so you didn’t have to

I’d open another wound and beat it down to my flesh if I could

I sob and ache, I feel a void in my body

but I’m still here,

hoping you’ll see the sun shine out of your window in a better place than the one I inhabit.